Pats Fans, Spare Us

Deadspin, home of some of the funniest takes on the New England Patriots, predicted that whatever the punishment was for Tom Brady and his team would give Patriots fans a chance to do what they do best, whine. Witness (from Slate’s Seth Stevenson): The letter also cites as a factor in the harsh punishment “the… Continue reading Pats Fans, Spare Us

Ten Things To Remember In the Wake of Super Bowl Disappointment (Pass the Paxil)

The Patriots won the Super Bowl. As always one can look to The Onion‘s brilliant headlines for a comforting chuckle: “Patriots Super Bowl Win Provides Storybook Ending To NFL Credibility.” Presumably Roger Goodell, the Senator Geary of the NFL, will soon help the Patriots whitewash their cheating scandal, and the air will stink of the farts of a… Continue reading Ten Things To Remember In the Wake of Super Bowl Disappointment (Pass the Paxil)

Feeling Deflated

So, the New England Patriots were caught playing with deflated footballs in the AFC Championship Game. While we wait for their inevitable excuse–my money’s on a reprise of Bill Belichick’s “We misinterpreted the rule” statement from Spygate–and for another inexplicably light punishment from Roger Goodell, I think I’ll take the opportunity to revise and extend… Continue reading Feeling Deflated

Are You Pondering What I’m Pondering?

It’s been a strange week here in Shangri-La. Strange and expensive. The reading tomorrow will come as a great relief, at least once I’m done. I’ve been rehearsing. Being myself in public takes a tremendous amount of practice. Attention James Bond villains: there’s a whole planet out there, larger than Earth, made of diamonds. Thanks… Continue reading Are You Pondering What I’m Pondering?