I’m actually glad John Kerry said this. I’m glad he said it in Germany, which has a habit of jailing its local idiots when they distribute their particular brand of idiocy.
Nevertheless, I’m sure that our local idiots will furrow their brows and concoct elaborate conspiracy theories about how the Obama administration is conspiring with the Jews and the New World Order to take their idiocy away, provoking runs in used bookstores on idiotic books, videos, and other media popular among today’s idiots. Idiots will gather together at Idiot Conventions to express their mutual affection for that same idiocy that our nation’s founders–who, according to our best credentialed idiot historians, were devout idiots, twits, mooks, and nimrods–knew would one day make this country great. The guests of honor at these conventions–Glenn Beck, Ted Nugent, and Orly Taitz–will collect huge fees denouncing those who would seek to confuse the nations’ millions of idiots with facts, ideas, or trenchant analysis. Then, at the sight of the Allegedly Persecuted Idiot (someone said he was wrong in public), the idiots will shout, “They took his dumb!” Took his dumb?” “Took his dumb!”
Eventually, the nation’s idiots, represented by the IRA (Idiot’s Rights Association) call on the President to name an idiot to the Supreme Court, remembering Senator Roman Hruska’s defense of previous idiot nominee G. Harold Carswell: “Even if he were mediocre, there are a lot of mediocre judges and people and lawyers. They are entitled to a little representation, aren’t they, and a little chance? We can’t have all Brandeises, Frankfurters and Cardozos.”